The Speeding Ticket

A driver is pulled over by a policeman for speeding.

The officer approaches the driver's door. "Is there a problem, Officer?" The policeman says, "Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your license, please?" The driver responds, "I'd give it to you, but I don't have one." "You don't have one?" "I lost it four times for drunk driving." The policeman is shocked. "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers, please?" "I'm sorry, I can't do that." "Why not?" "I stole this car." The officer says, "Stole it?" "Yes, and I killed the owner." "You what!?!" "She's in the trunk if you want to see." The officer backs away to his car and calls for backup. Within minutes, five police cars surround the vehicle. A senior officer slowly approaches, hand on his holster. "Sir, could you step out of your vehicle, please!" The man steps out. "Is there a problem, Officer?" "Open the trunk!" The man opens the trunk; it is empty. "Is this your car, sir?" "Yes," says the man, handing over the registration papers. The senior officer is stunned. "One of my officers claimed that you didn't have a license, stole this car, and murdered the owner." The man replies, "I bet the lying liar told you I was speeding, too!"