99 Problems

A lady calls tech support complaining that her network switch isn't working.

A technician arrives on the scene to witness a horror show. There are cables with exposed wires all over, the computer has every virus from the last six months, the keyboard has cigarette burns, and the CD drive is being used as an ashtray. The technician searches through a mass of wires and dust, coughing as he inhales it. He searches all around the house and only finds a modem. Eventually, he discovers the real source of the problem: the modem wasn't plugged in. He turns to the lady and says, "Well, ma'am, I have 99 problems, but a switch ain't one."