Golf Truths

The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant
elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that
allowed you to compensate for all your errors.

If it ain't broke, try changing your grip.

Golfers who claim they don't cheat, also lie.

Everyone replaces his divot after a perfect approach
shot.

A golf match is a test of your skill against your
opponent's luck.

It's surprisingly easy to hole a 50-foot putt when you
lie 10.

Counting on your opponent to inform you when he breaks a
rule is like expecting him to make fun of his own haircut.

Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts.

It's not a gimme if you're still away.

The shortest distance between any two points on a golf
course is a straight line that passes directly through the
center of a very large tree.

There are two kinds of bounces: unfair bounces, and
bounces just the way you meant to play it.