The Benefits of Beer

-- Beer doesn't drool.
-- Beer stains wash out easier than drool.
-- Beer will wait patiently in the car while you play (football, etc.).
-- Beer is never late.
-- Beer doesn't cry if you forget it.
-- Beer doesn't vote.
-- Beer never answers your phone.
-- Beer doesn't work your crossword puzzles in ink.
-- Beer doesn't demand to watch cartoons.
-- Beer won't ask loud, embarrassing questions in public.