Wishing Ill Will

I hope you lose your rabbit's foot and all the pennies that you put in piggy banks. May someone swipe your armchair and your favorite pipe. I wish you many a broken date, thinning hair, and a gain in weight. Missed connections, restless slumbers, hangnails, buttons dangling, and numbers never answering when you phone. I hope you bump your funny bone. And if perchance you should get sick, it's worrisome. May parking tickets plague you and your boss be mean. I hope you're tricked on Halloween. And when your life's all out of whack, perhaps you'll see you need me back. For soothing things that you can't cope with, that's what I keep up my hopes with.